


Run

by luciole_etoile



Series: roleplay/conversations [2]
Category: Undertale (Video Game)
Genre: Alternate Universe, Alternate Universe - Canon Divergence, Alternate Universe - Everyone Lives/Nobody Dies, Alternate Universe - Modern Setting, Angst, Angst and Feels, Angst and Hurt/Comfort, Angst with a Happy Ending, Angsty Schmoop, Fluff and Angst, Heavy Angst, Light Angst, M/M, timeline crash, wow gay as fuck
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-05-15
Updated: 2017-05-15
Packaged: 2018-11-01 06:58:26
Rating: Not Rated
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 1
Words: 4,640
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/10916694
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/luciole_etoile/pseuds/luciole_etoile
Summary: What happens when you make two Gasters meet each other? Science-- and also a fuck ton of angst.





	Run

 

Gaster stares down at the journal, expression unreadable. There's a slight crease in his brow, like he is confused and trying to dissect something without a scalpel.

 

After going through all of what the notes said and then some, Gaster looked over to the other with a slight grimace. Knowing all of this might make the other grow a bit hostile... Who wouldn't knowing what he's done to others. After all, he didn't know exactly what the monster staring at his journal was thinking... So just about any reaction could be coming up... Best be prepared for the worst.

Gaster is quiet, as he speaks. "...Why did you... do this, all?"

He continues to stare down at the journal, expression unreadable.

Still being unable to tell what emotions the monster holding his journal were feeling knew that Gaster had to tread carefully here... Or else it could result in disaster... It took a few moments for him to even think of an answer, a few more to phrase it, but only seconds to speak it. "I.... wanted to create weapons to use... against the humans.... But, clearly... I was of ill intent back then.... and I regret so..."

Gaster nods. "...I see." He closes the book. "...Do you truly, truly regret your decisions? Do you really feel remorse?"

"...How could I not? After all I have done to them... It made me feel like a true monster." He could no longer hold eye contact with the other, instead, his gaze drifted to the always black 'floor.' "Their virtue is they no longer have to deal with me... And I can no longer hurt anyone after what I have done to ensure it."

"...Though you may have committed some true sins, the fact that you even feel regret, remorse at your actions is what separates you from a true monster."

Gaster lifts his head. He gentle, understanding expression covers it. He puts a hand on the other's shoulder.

"What you did was not alright. But the fact that you are grieving is. The fact that you do not wish to hurt anyone else is alright."

Gaster sighs. It's tired, worn, like an old scarf washed and thrown around. "...Those children... They will surely never forgive you for what you have done. Not ever. And I will remember this vividly. But..."

"I think that you can still be a good person, if you really tried."

"That even the most despicable monster... could somehow turn into someone worth living for.."

 

 

"Is something I believe in. And I believe in you."

 

He tilts his head to the side a bit as he smiles.

* * *

 

 

Gaster suddenly freezes, and hunches over a bit as a sudden lance of pain, like someone--- someone... stabbing them, cutting through his chest--

 

"It-- hurts--"

 

But when he looks down, he's not dusting--

His form is melting, what's going on--?!

While the comforting was nice to hear, and did touch him quite closely, it didn't entirely clear up that guilt. One phrase even reminded him of the same one that one of the children repeated to himself before he went and did what he needed to. He was about to look back up at the other him with a smile, but... Then there was that hunching over. Concern instantly took over the gratitude he had for being comforted and he instead ended up putting one hand on the other's back. "Come on now, sit up. Come on..." Hearing that rasp of pain from the other sent a shiver through him, though he wouldn't let it stop him... But then, there was the melting. Oh stars... He recognized this... And much too well. "S-stay calm, sir, stay calm... You are going to be okay. Just... Just hold on, alright?" He tried his best to remain calm himself, which was working only so much. Even so, he wasn't going to let his own emotions get in the way of helping his melting other.

 

"--it hurts.. so much..."

 

Gaster trembles at the sheer violence of his pain, and when he feels that soothing hand on his back, he almost doesn't hear the voice call to him, but he tries--

The melting lessens a bit.

But as Gaster watches himself slowly dissolve he finds the panic worsening faster than the calm grows.  He grips his chest, where his SOUL seemed to be beating frantically.  His panicked, pained expression reflects all of his emotions and he is crying as he looks up to himself.

 

"...don't... go, please--"

 

His hand is the only thing anchoring him to "reality", what is reality?  Is he really alive when all of the things he does will only go back to zero at any moment? Will he remember his struggles? What if this has happened multiple times before? What if when he wakes up, if he wakes up, he is back in his bed with his sons what about this man what if when he wakes up no one is thERE--

His own emotions were the least of his worries. That's what he had to repeat to himself to make sure the other monster with him wouldn't sense his own fears and worries. The melting lessening was a blessing, if a small one. At least now he knew that if he calmed the other it might stop this process from completing. Ugh, but how the hell would you calm someone down like this? The only thing he knew was through words... And physical contact. He wasn't one for the contact... But seeing such fear in this monster he already held onto, he had to do something! Even if it ended up fruitless, it would be better than just sitting there only having helped part of the way. "I am not going to leave... Not now... And not for a long time..." He muttered calmly before taking a deep breath and wrapping himself around the monster. Whether it would help or not, he wouldn't know until the affects happened... But dear Stars did he wish for it to help.

Gaster's hand is melting as it grips desperately onto Gaster's counterpart, hoping that the solidness, solidarity of his mirror, would anchor him. Gaster begins to sob and cry loudly, at first trying to muffle his tears as he leans into the embrace. He feels like everything is wrong, where are his sons, why is this stranger being so kind?

As Gaster seemed to stop his dissolving somewhat, the other scientist found it fit to cling and whisper to him, thanking and asking him questions.

"why are you being so kind, friend..?"

"...please, i don't want to hurt you..."

"....what if we are stuck? you-- you have to..."

With every statement and query that slips out of his mouth, Gaster seems to solidify more, simply from physical contact.

But he is only becoming more and more miserable.

"....i'm sorry."

 

Every sob that he heard from the other him caused a shiver through him, a soft one, one that he tried to hold back as best he could so he could simply take care of this other. Thank the stars that he was solidifying... Even if it wasn't all entirely improvements. "You are not hurting me in any way... If we are stuck, so be it, but we will not be alone... We will have one another to hold onto, as we do now..." A soft and forced chuckle came from Gaster as he tightened his hold around the other, able to get a better grip now that he was more solidified. "No need for apologies... Just stay calm, friend... Only friend... Gyaha.."

 

Gaster seems to become unable to breathe.

He tries to speak anyways, even as his legs grow weak and though he wonders if he even has any legs anymore, he doesn't want to look and cries out when another lance of pain strikes him like knives through waiting foods.

Small puffs of air exit and enter his mouth as his chest heaves precariously, taking in too much or not enough, violently trembling and holding on to life-- to his other-- desperately as if he was the only thing keeping him from melting away fully.

His expression grows slack, as he slips, almost, from the other monster's grasp. He looks as though he is about to sleep.

Tired. Exhausted.

 

"...friend, it is... so much.."

 

His grip-- it loosens and the only thing holding him up is the other Gaster's hold.

Gaster goes frighteningly quiet. The only notions that show he is alive are the shuddering breathes he takes, growing in speed and slowing.

"... if i do not make it.. i'd like to know your name, at-- least-- friend,"

He tries for the same beaming smile that he made earlier, before all of this, and only manages a strained version of it, watered down like sunlight filtering through canopies and fluttering about like wisps of warmth.

"haha.. I do not believe for myself... to be very good company... I only wish for you to-- have the-- best, if you do continue to spend time-- with.."

The more words he tries to say, the more he chokes on them.

His thoughts are flowing out of his mouth.

".... friend, do not blame yourself... you are.. could be.. a good person.. if you tried--"

"... i t' ss o  pain f u l,f r iend."

Dear stars... This predicament wasn't getting any better despite how he tried to help. It was all so cheerful a minute ago, this monster now in horrible pain and barely able to choke out any words was comforting him just then... But now it was just going downhill quicker than he would have liked. "Do not care for me, friend... You should be the one to be cared for... You do not deserve this pain." Gaster tried to keep his grip on the other monster as tight as he could, without hurting him from such gripping of course. This poor monster looked worse than those two children he had done such horrible things to before... And it made his soul quake. This only made it worse with the other trying their best to still support him from his state of writhing pain. 

"I am Gaster... W. D. Gaster... But that does not matter right now. What matters is that you can get through this. You believe in me? Now take that belief and put it into the fact that you will be alright. Even if you think otherwise, just keep thinking so... And even if you disappear from me, you will find yourself somewhere else, I am sure... In either result..." Gaster looked down at his other self, seeing that watered down smile and giving his own, sure it was a bit easier for him considering he didn't have all the pain flowing through him that the other monster had, but it didn't mean it was partially a struggle to keep the smile up and as convincing as possible. "I will still be here, you will be freed from the pain, and these events between us will not be forgotten. I can promise you that I will remember you."

"Aha.. ha.. what-- coincidence-- I am... also called-- Gaster, ha.."

"Please... do keep your promise... I do not know what-- I will--"

 

Gaster freezes.

"Something is wrong--"

He cannot say anymore as suddenly a rush of air hits him and he's falling--

 

What's going on?

 

He's back in the void, but this time he is staring at the pitiful forms of... W.D. and himself, cradling and embracing, as he melts and seems to blur at the edges, crying.

He opens his mouth to speak and suddenly his "past?" self is staring at him.

"Something is wrong--"

He blinks again and tries to yell but no sound comes out as something grips his neck--

He's looking up at W.D., who had lain him on his lap as he gasped for air, going through the past and staring at himself--

The only thing that comes out his mouth is--

"Remember, friend, our-- promise--"

And he seems to go unconscious, having.. fallen down, but able to lose his form.

This was heart-tugging to say the least for W.D.. He wanted to help as much as he could, but he couldn't keep the one he held from falling down. Well... It was just inevitable, wasn't it? And now... He'd have someone to remember. It took him a moment to think of what he should do now that the monster had fallen down, but the least he could do was... Hmm... What was he supposed to do? Possibly start with letting the monster go... And so he did so. Gently, of course, he released himself from the other, trying not to let his emotions come out of him, and stood up, looking at parts of the goop that appeared to stain his own clothes. No need to change them for now... That was of least importance. "..I will not forget, friend.... I will never forget you..."

 

* * *

((would it be fucked up or what if he did forget though--))

* * *

 

(--And they're up on the surface and they're just dorking around, going to libraries and just hanging out with all the books and becoming part of the library, struggling to learn how to walk and like falling over each other, then just existing in cafes, eventually awkwardly coming to terms with Sans and Paps maybe not remembering them and having some heavy shit go down but be totally cool about it and just lean on the other)

(Yesssss yessss, I love these ideas~)

(One of them tries to be support for the other as they're learning to walk but they both screw up and then they both topple over. xD)

(And it's just total chaos because they are both Leg and they can't tell whose legs are whose

(It's literally them just teleporting and stumbling along, having those first step moments all over again)

( Do not let them close to the CORE DO NOT )

(ahaHAHAHAHAA)

(THEY'LL TRIP INTO THE LAVA)

(back into the void they goooooo)

* * *

 

He's been here for so long with W.D.... In the void. It has become familiar, almost "safe" to him, like a mother's warm embrace, a mother he will never see or hear.

 

They have become close, intimate, almost like lovers but not at all. A kind of bond that can only be described as brotherly and familial.

If you call intense physical contact at all times brotherly, that is.  Gaster likes to simply hold hands, sometimes hug, and just lean into W.D.  Things and actions of that caliber. He likes getting affection from the other as well and when it is especially cold, will snuggle up to W.D.'s side.  All of this is done unconsciously.

* * *

SCENARIO: The two are cuddling in bed together late at night after a long day of trying to learn to walk again.

Gaster remembers absentmindedly wrapping himself around W.D., tangling their long legs together and gently slinging him arms around W.D.'s neck, the blanket thrown over them to conserve as much heat possible.  He can't get over the fact that W.D., while being literally the same person, he now knows, is a full goddamn six inches taller than him.  What the fuck.  He has to actively look up. 

One morning W.D.'s hit right in the face with a pillow to get him up from Gaster.

 

"Wing Dings, get your body off of me, I can't move nor feel my right side." Gaster continues to hit W.D. with a pillow.  His voice has a husky timbre to it, from the sleep he has needed for years due to excessive research that was totally worth it.  He's squinting at W.D. with sleep encrusted eyes and is halfway buried underneath the other Gaster.

"Mmmm... Come on now, I was having such a pleasant dream..." Unlike how Gaster's voice was more husky thanks to the sleep, W.D.'s voice was a bit more... Childish and whiny. Not to the point where it was annoying, but it certainly wasn't all too pleasant to hear. Though, despite how he would've liked to just lay were he was, he shifted himself off of the other monster. But, not without pulling him close. "If I cannot have myself on you... Then I will go around you.. Gyaha..~"

"--Cheeky." Gaster makes a face at W.D., putting down the pillow. He instead returns his arm to his sides so he can hug the monster back, leaving his right arm to flop uselessly against W.D.'s chest.

He buries his face into W.D.'s warm neck and sighs contentedly as he feels sleep crawling upon him once again. "You're so warm, Wing Ding.."

"Not as warm as you are, Gaster..." As the two laid close together, W.D. rose one arm up to rub the back of the other's head as they would both be slipping to sleep. May as well make sure the other slept pleasantly since sweet dreams already came to him. "Sweet dreams..."

 

"Sweet dreams, Wings..." Gaster murmurs into W.D.'s neck as his eyes slip closed and he relaxes into W.D.'s hold, breathing evening out, deep and steady.

 

* * *

 

Gaster finds himself walking amongst a crowd, hand in hand with W.D., who is, at the time, looking for a certain shop he wanted to show Gaster.

The day is pleasant, warm and bright, fitting their moods easily. Though a few civilians sneer and glance at them for a bit long, no one makes any moves.

He is happy.

He is with W.D., warm.

And then, they find the shop. It is a bookstore, filled with sci-fi novels, comics, and many books of the scientific kind and it is glorious.

Gaster is as enamored with it as W.D. is.

They exit the shop after purchasing a few novellas and a thick book on alien sightings as well as the theoretical possibilities of having and being in contact with creatures from outer space when suddenly, he is pulled into an alleyway, and drops their bag.

Gaster is taken hostage. A strange, new, and unfamiliar piece of machinery, held like a weapon, which it probably is, is held to his cranium and he feels his SOUL shudder.

Anti-monsterkind human activists.

The same people who were glaring at the two in the park, in the crowds.

He lets out a cry, and is muffled by the hand of the one holding him. He realizes that the man is shaking and he feels a flare of vicious mercy spark inside of him and has the urge to talk, to give the man a chance to redeem himself when another human comes out and it is with a gleaming, smoking weapon he knows to be called a gun and--

Wing Ding is shot.

The noise echoes through his head and slices through it like the bullet through Wing Ding and he's crying and screaming for help and Wing Ding's name is dribbling from between his lips but he doesn't move he won't answer his body is dusting but it stays when Gaster breaks the human's hold with a burst of magic and kneels before him and it's like his world is ending-- his world is eNDING WING DING ANSWER MY CALLS HEAR YOUR NAME MY NAME PLEASE DON'T LEAVE ME YOU PROMISED YOUR PROMISE YOU PROMISED US--

He takes a deep shuddering breath and he shrieks to the high heavens-- to the clouds, to the skies and never the heavens because how could there be a heaven without Wing Ding and how would it exist with the gods that have never answered his pleas for help--

He mourns.

The humans laugh and point at him, mocking and humiliating him for his need to grieve his friend.

His only friend.

Their laughs are choked by the red fluid called blood that flows from their lips when he pierces their chests and rips their hearts out, shoving the organs into their mouths to laugh on, who is laughing now, who iS LAUGHING NOW--?!

Wing Ding's memorial is attended by no one but himself.

It is private.

Bright.

Warm.

Like the world didn't even acknowledge his death.

Like he wasn't worth crying for.

Like he wasn't worth just as much, maybe even more than the others who came before him.

...

Gaster attempts suicide and finds he cannot.

He is tormented, endlessly until he wakes up in Wing Ding's arms to find it was all a dream, that they are safe, that Wing Ding would continue to hold him close and safe until both of them died, not leaving only one to savor the sour memories left behind like aged wine drank far too soon, youth cut down, warmth and light cut down far too soon--

Gaster shakily huffs into Wing Ding's neck and cries quietly, the sobs heaving his chest the only sign of his tears.

Wing Ding cries for him as well.

W.D. found himself somewhere else... Somewhere that shouldn't have been where he was. It wasn't the void, but it wasn't on the surface either. It was... back underground? Taking a moment to take in the surroundings... It seemed that he was in bed, though not with anyone else, which concerned him. His new location? Snowdin Inn. Not where he should be, especially without Gaster with him. Wait- who? W.D. shook his head with a huff afterwards, deciding to get up and out of the Inn. Apparently he wasn't sleeping there long, so pay wasn't necessary. Lucky for him, he didn't even feel like looking through his pockets, especially with a certain incomprehensible feeling going through him as he left. It felt awfully cold, but not due to the weather. If anything, it was still, yet it still sent chills down his spine. 

Deciding to move along, he somehow found it unsurprising he was able to step along on his own, though why wouldn't he be able to walk regularly? His legs worked fine. The walking along seemed to slow down not long after it began, as a thick fog was surrounding the area. Maybe he'd wandered somewhere he shouldn't have? Oh well, time to back track. 

 

Or it would be, if he hadn't bumped into someone just a few inches shorter than him. 

 

He stumbled back, almost falling onto his rear as he steadied himself and looked down at who he had bumped into, pardoning himself. At that moment, he recognized who smaller monsters with the one who looked awfully like himself. He began to apologize again, but was cut off by a gruff, harsh voice, accompanied by a few small sniffles from the smaller monsters. Those two seemed to be scraped up, injured even, but before he was able to show his concern he was just about verbally attacked. Correction, he was. Being told he'd been breaking promises and that he's lost hope in him. What was all this about? It hurt his SOUL like he should have known, but... 

 

He didn't. 

 

It hurt him so much, but he just couldn't figure out why. Not like he'd be able

to considering how hurtful the words coming at him were. How he's done horrible things, how he was no longer believed in, how he wasn't a good person... And how he deserved to rot. It just about made him well up in tears. He was confused, but he felt so hurt. What had he done? What had he done so wrong? The assault continued until a certain nickname was uttered in that same threatening tone. "Dings." However it caused a flood of memory, it sure caused a lot... Memories that he didn't want to be reminded of... How despicable he was... How emotionless and harsh he was. It hurt. It hurt him so very much. And those memories didn't even account for what he now recognized in front of him. Gaster, and the bone brothers he created. How could he have forgotten? 

 

He made a promise not to... Oh no.... 

 

W.D. then started to shout out apologies to the other, pleading for forgiveness, only to be met with a cold stare that felt it was aimed right for his SOUL. Dings stuttered and tried so hard to give his sincerest condolences, but it soon met with nothing but a sharp bone attack right into his chest. He let out a yelp before having to collapse in the ground and write there like a maggot. ..And he certainly did feel like one at the point. He weakly stared up at the disappointed monster whom turned away, the desperate apologies turning to pleadings of help as the monster simply walked away with the two smaller monsters with him. He was left there, bone in his chest, pain of all types flooding all of his senses. Choked up sobs were the only things he was able to utter through his now hoarse voice. He could feel himself falling down already... Maybe... Maybe he deserved such a fate... His thoughts faded along with his sight as he accepted this to be what would become of him, dusting as a disappointment and a betrayer... That is until his body just about shocked him awake. He sat tense on the bed for quite a while before being able to recognize that what happened was just a dream…

No... a nightmare. A very, very dreadful nightmare. "Th-thank the Stars..." His shaking voice was able to just barely get out of him before he held Gaster closer to him than ever. He wouldn't be letting go for the rest of the night.... Not after that...

Gaster's slender form pressed against W.D.'s perfectly and his sobs were just barely audible over the loud silence of their bedroom.

"Don't... go..."

Gaster leaned into W.D. further, tears flowing freely.

"Please, don't...-- I--"

Great, shuddering sighs racked his thin bodice as he tried the breathing exercises that W.D. had recommended to him once after they had found out he had a strange type of illness with symptoms that included fits like asthma.

 

Gaster looks up at W.D., and notices the fact that he is awake, upset, and pieces these shards of evidence together to get; he's had a nightmare, cuddle the fuck out of him.

Gently, shakily, he brings his hand up to cup the back of W.D.'s head, pulling him down to where Gaster can reach him.

He begins to put light, chaste kisses, brushing his lips against W.D.'s face light enough for them to be as soft as butterfly wings, along W.D.'s cheek, following along an invisible path to pepper those kisses all over the taller monster's face, over his eyelids, on his forehead, just lightly pressing his mouth against the other's face.

He traces his counterpart's face with his thumb, whispering soft, soothing nothings to him, after making sure he's covered enough of him without smothering him.

He closes his eyes as he lets W.D. press closer, press him closer to his chest, and it's warm, just like in his nightmare, and he's so, so afraid that--

 

"--We're safe, Wing. We're safe."

 

Gaster can't call this love. Not the romantic kind.

But he feels strongly, positively, protectively for this monster, who looks so much like himself and has the same nightmares and fears as himself--

And he's willing to go beyond what could be considered a societal limit, for this monster.

Gaster presses their foreheads together, regardless of how slightly uncomfortable it is craning his neck like this--

And he croons, low and soft, like the hum of the heater during a winter night, providing warmth and something familiar to draw from.  
  
  


**Author's Note:**

> , this could never happen tbh


End file.
